The beginning in the end.

i have the most belief in music when i know for certain it is helping someone. i have the most inspiration to create when i know for certain that there is always someone i can share with, no matter a friend who lives a block away or a friend i don't yet know living half a world away. i have the most conviction in my writing when i realize nothing astonishes me anymore.

(sometimes i feel nothing anymore, and i sometimes feel again. i find that in the process of growing up, i've un-believed in many things but found home elsewhere)

Deepavali.

at one of my best friend's home, celebrating the Festival of Lights yesterday. :)

+i know it has been far, far overdue but i am finally announcing the winner of my giveaway! i apologize so profusely for the delay and i feel really bad for it. :/ and let me tell you, though were only 8 entries, it was still a challenge to choose the lucky one! and to make matters worse, i'm the most indecisive person, hahaha. so after going over and picking apart all the answers from you lovelies, the winner of this giveaway is... Brig! :)

here was her answer to my question:

"my favourite type is probably everyday photography because it captures what people normally forget. whether it's the highs or the lows, when we look back on the photos it triggers memories which would have otherwise been left behind and then from that more and more branches of the past are revisited and i think that's pretty amazing

p.s. i like photography in general because when you look at a photograph you're not just looking at it, it evokes all of the senses (i'm not sure if that made sense so e.g. the smell of pasta or the sound of the ocean etc)"

thank you to all who entered it, it was so wonderful reading everyone's answers! :)

much love. x

One night to speed up truth.

this month has been a flurry, and so will next month, up until i will be free of high school. so are my photographs. i can never seem to get them organized nor chronologically arranged in order! so the first few photos are from June, some from the weekend and the last one, today. that photograph of the library was taken at the college i will be going to next year.

frankly, (and i'm sure everyone feels the same but i can't help but write this down) i am SO afraid to start college. i'm anxious and pretty sure that on my first day, i'd be fumbling. i'm nervous to meet new people and to make new friends. newness and change terrifies me and yet i know i need it so much.

After the rain, I need you so much closer.

the first five photographs are from warm dusks last week, the other five are from rainy evenings this week. i love both sun-painted clouds and skies, twig and leaf-scattered roads. the most are tree-puddles with breezes gently passing over them.

i realized today that i am the most myself i've ever been in the longest while. i smiled with contentment at how this is who i am, after feeling and unfeeling, thinking and unthinking and being and unbeing. this is who i want to be and am, for this moment at least. if anything should change though, i might change with it together.

"Everything flows and nothing stands still."

-Heraclitus of Ephesus

p.s. please do read my first guest post here! i really enjoyed putting it together, i hope you enjoy reading it. :) if you haven't been following Jada's blog, do it now! 

On my wall.

over the weekend, i went to pick up photos from my first roll using my La Sardina, (Cosima) and it turns out the roll was blank! i was so disappointed and it was the girl at the store who loaded it for me at first. so all day i was really down about it and i decided to work on a project to take my mind off of it. (after all, film does have this effect on people)

my grandma + grandpa, with photos of sunsets by my aunt and uncle.

 '70s European postcards that i mentioned here.

 all b&w photographs from when my grandparents were just starting a family and my mum and her siblings were children.

photographs of my mum, aunts, grandma when she was young (square one) and the old family pet, Lassie. :)

it feels wonderful to have some of my most favorite photographs of some of my most favorite people here. :)

(words)

(photo belongs to Sophie Richards, from here)

under my eyes are dark with lassitude,
and i feel like The Smiths

i want to be sung to sleep,
not to wake up on my own

and i wish i knew some people longer than now

and some i wish i knew fleetingly.

and there are words i have read

and photos i have kept in my mind, that make me feel
inadequate.

and i see everything around me, complete

and yet, incomplete. there is no face to be with as one.

and i feel this itch, maybe an ache. knowing i can

accomplish more

and yet,

nothing.

i want to photograph ballerinas, people. i need more

faces.

a poor attempt, but i hope you will bear with.

i have a deep longing to write

it does not come easy and is rare.

and yet,

here are my feelings.

Saturday.

 rainbow and raindrops in the car.

my puppy on the table with his bears.

 toast with honey+butter, lychee-rose tea.

 flowers adorn my hair.

wishful levitation, stars in the library.

Diaphanous

Diaphanous from tasha faye on Vimeo.

made from little fragments of my everyday life. (:
sometimes it's quintessential to be reminded of the little pleasures. x
(watch on Vimeo for HD!)

Erised.

in the time i've been absent, i've been back to my hometown to see my aunt and her family who were back from Melbourne! (: we went to a fun fair that Saturday night and the rest are some scattered photos.

"Even this late it happens:
the coming of love, the coming of light.
You wake and the candles are lit as if by themselves,
stars gather, dreams pour into your pillows,
sending up warm bouquets of air.
Even this late the bones of the body shine
and tomorrow’s dust flares into breath."

— The Coming of Light by Mark Strand

i wish i could write as eloquently.

much love x